Merging with the eternal, one organism at a time...

"Now, this is my job, I will not quit it
Pulled me out the depths when I thought that I was finished
Yeah I questioned if I could go the distance
That's just the work, regardless of who's listening, listening

Listen, see I was meant to be a warrior
Fight something amongst me, leave here victorious
Classroom of kids, or a venue performing
If I'd had done for the money I'd have been a fucking lawyer

Concrete, vagabond, van telling stories
Humbled by the road, I'm realizing I'm not important
See life's a beautiful struggle, I record it
Hope it helps you maneuvering through yours and
That's why we stay in the lab at night
I've been staring into this pad for over half my life
A true artist won't be satisfied
So I guess that's the sacrifice
And I say

Make the money, don't let the money make you
Change the game, don't let the game change you
I'll forever remain faithful, All my people stay true..." Macklemore

This post contains some reflections about life, death, consciousness and physiology... Just a small topic. Bear with me. I have a few separate thoughts to share, and then a convergence of them to ponder...These are not meant to be declarations of fact nor of faith. They are just ponderings. I am still recovering from Max's sudden decline and death so that will color my thoughts a bit, but then, that is one of my points....Let me begin: 

1. Stress and emotions (grief being one cause of these) influence what pathways we use in our brains to process information. They influence what we remember and what can trigger those memories. There is an interplay between 2 brain regions (the amygdala and the hippocampus) in regard to how/what we remember. This is why sometimes a smell or a passing image can trigger a vivid memory. That's your amygdala activating. The stronger the "emotional content' of the original event, the more the amygdala is involved. 

2. It not uncommon that after someone close to you dies, you "feel their presence." Maybe you just expect to see them somewhere...I have a vivid recollection of my son's first communion which happened about 3 months after my dad died. I felt him there in the church. I expected to look up and see him. Those moments may be more intense and more frequent initially, and then fade.

3. IF consciousness is a property of the universe (like gravity eg see my earlier posts), and individual organisms/beings tap into this property in different ways and to different extents depending on their biological composition, then what happens when the individual biological organism dies and gives up it's biochemical "ego"?

4. When the physical being dies, it decays and turns back to "dust", to molecules, to atoms, is it's tie with consciousness then released back into the universe? If so can others who are close to them pick up some of that individuality during the process?  If you have shared memories and shared sensations then is part of the consciousness that the individual  "used" for lack of a better word, then able to be a part of you- even if "just" as a memory. Remember memories have emotional content and emotion influences what we remember and how we invoke that memory...

Initially after a loss, the grief is more acute, and the memories are stronger, the connection feels more "real", more physical. But then time passes and the acuity of the grief can fade, and maybe some of the emotion related to the memories changes, can it be that other being has become a part of you and so more familiar and "unremarkable"? I'd like to believe it is a gain and not a loss of your connection.

And when you die, who will you merge with? We are all part of the whole.

Remember, I am a person who understands the world as a scientist, as one who respects the mysteries remaining and the power of stories. I think they all interconnect. Learning more about the science, shouldn't devalue the experience.

Just some ramblings. I would love to hear your thoughts...Also read "Behave" by Robert Sapolsky (2017). Don't be put off by the length or the book or the "scientific" content. He is a wonderful writer and the book is so full of information and thoughts to ponder. I will end with his final words from the book: 

"If you had to boil this book down to a single phrase, it would be "It's complicated." Scientists keep saying, "We used to think X, but now we realize that..." Eventually it can seem hopeless that you can make things better. But we have no choice but to try. And if you are reading this, you are probably ideally suited to do so. You've amply proven you have intellectual tenacity. You probably also have running water, a home, adequate calories, and low odds of festering with a bad parasitic disease. You probably don't have to worry about Ebola virus, warlords or being invisible in your world. And you've been educated. In other words, you're one of the lucky humans. So try."

And then: "Finally, you don't have to choose between being scientific and being compassionate."

Amen.

My spotify playlist is in progress, but Bob Schneider's newest release: "I Love this Life." is definitely on it and a great listen.

Peace out.

Sheila

PS Bonus quote from "The Maytrees" Annie Dillard 2007 "It was then Lou began to wonder: If overcoming self centeredness was the goal, then why were we born into a selfish stew? "